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War's Impact at Home(PDF)

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Today, the group includes volunteers whose military service ranges from World War II to the Persian Gulf. "War and violence have continued throughout the 25 years of the Veterans Education Project's existence, says Wilson, "and the need for our programs and the insights of our veterans has never lessened. Now, with all the parallels between Vietnam and Iraq emerging, the lessons of our Vietnam War veterans are especially relevant. We have kept our basic mission the same, but we always are evolving new programs, such as the Violence Prevention Programs we started in the mid-1990s and the Military Families Connect group. the flexibility, and the dedication of the people who volunteer so much of their time to work with us, is what sustains (the project)."

If the issue of services for returning veterans had not already been in the public eye, it became dramatically so when a young woman in Belchertown, Marine Corps Lance Cpl Jeffrey M. Lucey, committed suicide in 2004. His parents, Kevin P. and Joyce T. Lucey, had been trying to het help from the Veterans Administration for their despondent 23-year-old son. Since then, they have become strong advocates for those returning from war. they were among those who urged the Veterans Education Project to start a family support group, and they are still members.

"We have wonderful friends and colleagues who have always been a support to us," says group member John K. Stranlund of Amherst, "but these people know exactly what you're going through." He and his wife, Laura Miller Stranlund, have a son who has been in the service since 1999. Sgt First Class Jonathan M Miller is on his third tour to southwestern Asia. "There is an isolation that military families feel," says Laura Stranlund, "because war is not part of the everyday collective experience."

They just needed to talk to each other,"says Susan Leary, program coordinator at the Veterans Education Project. "They were so alone in the community. We knew there needed to be a way for them to get together other than randomly running into each other at these programs." Now, members of the group have become so close that they have shared telephone numbers. "The first couple of meetings were hard, with difficult emotions." say Leary. "Now, people are miuch more comfortable. There's a level of trust. They are so happy just to see each other. They hug each other. They kick off their shoes.

There's a cummulative knowledge and experience in the group," says Wilson, director of the Veterans Education Project, "but it's the human-to-human contact that means so much."

The group is small with about a dozen members, and they are pretty selective about who may attend meetings. People not associated with military families, no matterhow well-intentioned, are discouraged, and all newcomers are asked to call the Veterans Education Project for details on the meeting times and places. (Which doesn't mean there aren't a lot of things the general public can do. At a recent talk at the Food for Thought Bookstore in Amherst, the group listened as a speaker mentioned the need for a "citizens corps.")

Although it is not the only family support group in the area, the Veterans Education Project has been getting questions from other parts of the country about what makes their family support group work. Two important features: It is a peer group, and it is nonpartisan.

It was decided that the group would be run by its members rather than a therapist or facilitator, although psychotherapists were part of the team that founded it. "We wnat to know what people do to cope," says Leary. Though they are not experts, they say things like, "I know so-and-so who might be able to help you figure out what to do." They keep track of legislators who are symnpathetic to veteran's issues.

Arguing about politics is not allowed in the group, and members are reminded of that at the beginning of each meeting. The focus is on the soldiers, and their decision to serve is respected. "It's not an anti-war group," says Laura Strandlund, "though to say that people don't get angry would not be honest."

"We don't get into conversations about whether the war is right or wrong," says Bob Massey. "We do get into conversations about whether veterans are being treated for problems." Recently, Massey's son, Rob, 26, sent an email to his father from Iraq. Its tone leaves no doubt that young people like him deserve respect, no matter what the politics. "Life isn't all that bad here," wrote the young captain in an effort to cheer up his dad. "This conflict in the Middle East is undoubtedly the defining event for my generation," he continued, "as Vietnam was before and Korea and WWII before that. When it is all said and done, our family can take pride in knowing that we gave back when others were either unable, or unwilling....We've done it so the rest of the country doesn't have to. That is something to be proud of."

An updated version of our website is under construction. For more information on VEP's programs, to learn about volunteer and training opportunities or to arrange for a VEP presentation in a Western Massachusetts school or public forum, email us at vep@crocker.com. Our mailing address is P.O. Box 416, Amherst, MA 01004

P.O. Box 416, Amherst, MA 01004         vep@crocker.com